Happy Ending

I’m pretty sure the idea of a “happy ending” massage came into my consciousness via “Schitt’s Creek,” the iconic Dan Levy series that I’ve watched more than a dozen times. 

If you’re not familiar, there’s an episode where Levy’s character David is gifted a massage from his fiancé Patrick, on the morning of their wedding day. When Patrick returns home, David is giggly. He reports that it was the first time he’d ever received a “happy ending” during a massage.

Patrick is, understandably, shocked that his partner has orgasmed at the hands of another man. “He gave you a happy ending?! On our wedding day???” He screeches. “I thought you wanted that!” David retorts.

It’s hilarious, one of my favorite scenes from the whole series. You can watch it below. 

But it wasn’t just funny—it was also an awakening for me. I was already a fan of massages, even if their price meant I didn’t get them super often. Adding an orgasm to the experience? Well, sign me up.

In reality, it’s not so easy to find a professional who offers such a service—and if they do, they probably don’t advertise it publicly, or in so many words. 

For years I held this curiosity, and in the meantime did receive a few sexy amateur massages from various lovers. One of them, in fact, told me he had been licensed as a massage therapist, which I was inclined to believe, considering he gave me some of the best massages of my life (for free!).

But still, this didn’t totally scratch the itch. I was yearning for a proper, professional (lol) happy ending. Just recently, I stumbled upon a masseur on Instagram who offered, specifically, the type of erotic message I was seeking. 

I made an appointment for the day after I got home from a hiking trip, figuring my sore muscles would be especially grateful for the trained touch of another man.